Staff Writer Ollie OddvardWe hate to disappoint those fans and adherents of extraterrestial life, but we Oddvarks have been around for a number of generations now. We are not sure exactly when we ‘woke-up’, but as far as my family’s stories go back, we have been ‘aware’. We have chosen to remain apart from humankind for some fairly obvious reasons. First and foremost is mankind’s predilection for violence and genocide. Humans also seem to rank fairly high on racism and discrimination. Until recently, we have always remained secret and hidden just to make sure our kind survives. Well, except for grandma Hollie, who used to have a whimsical aspect to her personality. Ol’ grandma Hollie would occasionally sneak around the US Pacific Northwest and sometimes even travel to the high Himalaya’s where she would run around in a big hairy costume. We all giggle and roll around on the floor whompin our tails and lollygagging our tongues when we see news stories about Bigfoot and the Abominable Snowman. But, I digress.

With today’s anonymity, and the pervasive electronic cybershell of the Internet to support our continued physical separation from YOU humans (please excuse my species centrism), we feel that we can, at least, communicate. Don’t try to find us. We live underground and tap your buried cables to make all this possible. Speaking for myself, I can’t resist participating in all the bizarre, weird, and oddball stuff mankind is into. So I have decided to put my head just a tad above ground and let you all know of our existence. You will find no greater enthusiast for mankind’s quirks than me. Besides, having another species point of view will be the best way to know what is truly “odd” about humans.